1. Admit that you are powerless and that your life is best managed by strict adherence to progressive ideology.
Congratulations for taking this, your first step towards recovery. You will soon find a new global community of friends that are just like you. Your first step requires you to surrender independent thinking and acknowledge the wisdom of the majority. It is essential you learn to disregard facts in favor of consensus. Consensus to be defined by your sponsor, the Democrat party.
2. Come to believe that the power of progressive ideas can restore you to popularity and boost your self-esteem.
This step opens a vista of new hope and, if completed successfully, will guarantee you instant popularity and numerous social opportunities. Please visit www.move-on.org for the most current definition of progressive ideas. Keep in mind, it is not necessary to actually believe in these ideas but you must learn to give the impression that you do. (For the learning challenged, this means it's OK to fake it.) Relax, have fun. You'll be amazed how easy it is to fool most people.
Source: Right Bias
Hat Tip: Free Republic